I have written previously about the value of giving feedback in pitch processes. Well, brace yourselves, because I’ve not exhausted all I have to say on feedback.  The thoughts swirling around my mind have to go somewhere, so they’re going here.

Everything I say, I say with deep empathy for the challenges many client-siders are wrestling with. This can include the pressures that come with navigating uncertain operating environments, politics, excessive workloads and more.

All the same… is it just me who’s finding it hard to get feedback these days?  For a people pleaser type (and being self-critical tends to come with this terrain), that can be quite tough. People like me can be sensitive to the signals that some work may not somehow have landed optimally, or a debrief was tricky, or a call had an odd dynamic.  We read body language, facial expressions – and we read into what’s said and what’s not said. I am sure there are many who feel like this in the sector.

I’m just someone with mild ‘people pleaser’ leanings. There will be plenty of people in insights with an ADHD profile, and who may have something that can go along with this called ‘rejection sensitive dysphoria’.  RSD is thought to be very common amongst people with ADHD and is characterised by extreme sensitivity towards perceived rejection or criticism. Note the ‘perceived’ in that sentence. 

Whatever your comfort with uncertainty and criticism, it’s typically incredibly hard to read the room when running meetings remotely. Yes, naturally the solution that presents itself is to get in the room with clients more. This is absolutely worth doing, but, of course, there will always be many meetings (including major ones like pitches and debriefs) that are done online by default, because the clients are dispersed now, too.

However hard it can be to be certain, or to know why this is the case, there are just those times when you feel the vibe is off. Everyone has their cameras off, there’s little Q&A, no-one says thanks at the end, or just one person says ‘nice job’. Or there’s just an intangible, subtle weirdness to the whole thing.

Maybe, even, the meeting (or the whole damn project) seems to go smoothly, with no discernible hurdles or even wrinkles. You get to the end, you send the final output, and then… nothing. No acknowledgement. You ask for feedback. No response.

It feels like the signals here are that something wasn’t great. Or, of course, the person is probably just up against it and they’ve moved on already. Who knows? 

I think it’s perhaps particularly hard, if I’m being really honest, if you’re the project lead, and a senior in your business. If you’re a junior- or mid-level team member, you can expect feedback from your senior colleagues, and you’re likely not the one asking the client for feedback.

However, if you’re senior, you are probably responsible for hitting targets, and might be directly responsible for keeping people in your company employed. You’re not necessarily going to get feedback on the quality of the work (and what you could have done differently) from inside your agency. If it doesn’t come from your client, the vacuum can be difficult to fill.

Many of us will have the self-confidence to know a lot of the time that we’ve unquestionably done a good job. A focus group ran perfectly to time but with a very rich discussion that hit all the objectives. A workshop generated a raft of good ideas. A debrief was impactfully presented. 

It’s just that occasionally, our instinct isn’t enough.  Sometimes we don’t know an individual client, their stakeholders or their business well enough to know if our quality standards match theirs, and you can only learn that for sure through doing. 

Guesswork isn’t ideal, though. In a competitive market, it’s imperative we keep developing and deliver the best possible work. The only way we can do this with confidence, and channel our energies effectively towards meeting our clients’ needs, is through getting feedback. 

I promise that silence is worse than knowing for sure, even if there’s some constructive criticism. So, expect me to be sending a feedback form more often going forwards. And, if you read this and think ‘damn, I didn’t tell her she was awful on that project last year’, I also promise I’d honestly rather know… I think!