A comedy of errors

Not using goal mouth technology. Using that Adidas ‘Jabulani’ ball. Not banning the vuvuzela trumpets, and half the national teams not turning up. The early signs are that we have more to criticise than compliment at this World Cup.

I wonder if Fifa regret ruling out the use of goal mouth technology now that England and Mexico feel so aggrieved about goals that, respectively, were and never were, but which the referees called the other way round. There aren’t many players either, who have come out and said they love playing with Adidas’ new Jabulani ball. The ball that seems to fly and bounce around like no other ball that has gone before, keeping strikers and goal keepers alike on their toes, guessing as to what it is going to do next. What about the vuvuzela trumpet? It started as a novelty and quickly evolved into a monotonous drone that has blocked out the chanting and singing from the loyal fans that paid to be inside the stadium and get behind their team. And let us not forget the lacklustre Italy, France and now England – big teams not turning up to entertain us on the big stage.

Am I going to complain for the entire blog? Well you weren’t really expecting an upbeat entry when we’ve just been dumped out 4-1 by Germany were you!?

Well actually I’m not. In spite of all this we’re all still very optimistic on the World Cup Panel and in the words of Portugal (one of our happier panellists), “We will forget the negative detail in the future and instead remember those moments, or games, of brilliance that WILL happen. That’s the bigger picture.” With a 7-0 result in the bag the Portuguese can afford to be optimistic.

Are we able to put the detail to one side and see the bigger picture when we’re so close to the topic? Can we really put our objectivity to one side and see the wood from the trees? Well as researchers that’s exactly what we are paid to do; we can’t get bogged down in internal politics, let personal agendas get in the way of the bigger research story, or let that one strange statistic guide us away from the bigger headline.

So it’s no surprise that whilst representing their home nations, wearing their hearts on their sleeves, our panel are indeed able to don that subjective hat and offer impartial observations that help us understand the World Cup on a global scale. OK, OK, stating that England are rubbish is hardly new insight, and backing Brazil to win the tournament is not really putting anyone’s neck on the line, but we’ve all been able to see past our own country’s shortcomings and offer advice and feedback on some of the more, wider-reaching issues at hand: What’s the best food to eat whilst watching the World Cup?

You see, even the Germans have accepted that their sausage is just too long and can obscure the TV view. The Mexicans love nachos but make a mess of it when not concentrating; the salsa goes everywhere. And the English accept that a diet of only beer just isn’t a long term strategy; you always end up hungry.So I’m proud to present the World Cup food of choice: an Italian buffet of pizza and assorted breads. Would an objective panel have allowed one nation to rise above the international cuisine competition? I think not. That’s why we’re so special.